CARL’S ANTI-RESOLUTIONS: 3 REASONS TO TRASH YOUR PLANS AND BE HAPPY
Hey everybody! Carl the Flamingo here. I’m dictating this into my phone from the deck of my yacht. Boy, is it awesome having a yacht. I. Love. Yachts. However, they are costly to maintain. Man! I have so many problems! Anyway, my New Year’s Resolution was not to brag so much about my yacht. And I already broke it. Which brings me to my main point:
Trash your New Year’s Resolutions. At goodr, we’re all for personal growth, but we’re also for enjoying life. Like by indulging in cheat meals. Which can also result in personal growth -- in your belly! Not for me, though. My body is perfect. I have a six-pack, you just can’t see it under the feathers. Where was I? Oh yeah. Our new Anti-Resolution sunnies...
Pizza, ice cream and tacos?! Those aren’t MY favorite foods!!! My favorite food is shrimp!!! WHERE is the shrimp-inspired sunglass?!?!?! ARGH. This is such an injustice. First, the cost of maintaining a yacht, now this. I guess life can’t be perfect. And neither can you. So feel free to break that restrictive meal plan. It’s worth it. And you can trust me. I have a yacht.
Carl the Flamingo